I Feel Pretty…Oh So Pretty…

You know the jingle. Today though I felt pretty. This doesn’t happen a lot but I’m working on self acceptance. So, I lived in the moment and felt good about me. It’s a nice feeling. It’s growth.

Single Momma Win…

As most who know me my life drastically changed around March 2016. Due to my “event” AKA heart attack I lost a job and well lots of other whatever happened.

Fast forward to today. Single mom (In a relationship with a single dad who’s pretty awesome), working two jobs, and in school full time (did I mention I made the full time Deans Honor List?), with two rare artery conditions and I realize I am in not financially as I once was BUT….

Today I fixed my sons iPad screen, got my daughter her first facial at my favorite Organic Spa, and got us all some boba tea.

I’m tired a lot. I do a lot. Today though felt like a win. I know it’s not about money because money doesn’t buy happiness but both my kids needed things and I was able to take care of it.

We had a great family day out as well. Here’s some images of our adventures. Today was a total mom win.

PCOS Blues

I hate PCOS. Fact.

I was feeling good about losing some of my heart attack weight. I was down 10 lbs. of the 58 I needed to lose after the heart meds I was on caused rapid weight gain.

I didn’t plan right for a weekend and gained 7 lbs. Over a weekend. No joke and I don’t over eat. I just ate gluten like a dumb-ass. Here’s the thing, I’m also trying intuitive eating. Because of PCOS and all I’ve gone through I deprive myself…a lot. I’ve learned to live that way and for the most part it’s not an issue. I’ve learned through this experience that I just can’t have gluten. Even in little amounts. Gluten and I are not friends. We have to break up. My body holds onto whatever I eat with gluten, I don’t process it right in my body, I feel bloated and gross for days.

I also have on top of it all Reactive Hypoglycemia. My sugar will crash when I have sugary foods or foods high in fat. I never have high blood sugar just low. I think this is because of the gastric bypass I had in 2007. The surgery that didn’t cure the PCOS but helped. The surgery that I blame my health decline on. The surgery in some ways I’m still grateful for…even with these issues.

I’m NOT giving up. I’m writing this for those who may also struggle with PCOS, I need to be passionate about this again. I have body dysmorphic disorder and I can’t let it win. Know that the weight, though harder for some, will come off. I’m not, after all my hard work letting PCOS win. I’ve already pre-packed for a short trip to the mountains for the 4th of July…No gluten for me, intuitive eating, keto friendly, and living my best life even when PCOS wants me to feel horrible about myself, I won’t let it.

Until next time.