Author: Kat

Beautiful Mess, reinventing myself. It happens.

Luxury AKA The Extras

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As it’s been said in previous posts I’m on a super strict budget. On this budget and being in a whole new financial situation I’ve learned to cut my own hair, color my own hair, get cheap haircuts and pretty much try and save money any way I can but feel like I’m beautiful or at least very pretty.

I was given some money from a bond that matured from when I was married. I was able to buy Christmas gifts and I got my hair done.

Normally it would be a fun experience to get ones hair done BUT for me it was just to make my hair look decent. To have a even cut, straight bangs and hair all one color. To me this was a luxury and something that needed to be done.

These days I need to pick and choose what’s important. I want and possibly need blue ballet flats but those can wait. Really the black ones I have can go with everything. There’s also so much I want to get me but I’m glad I made the decision I did and I will save to get my hair done every couple of months. It’s something I can look forward to and practice a bit of self-care.

My normal color and haircut but I feel more put together. That’s what matters.

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Gratitude through the tired….

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One can be totally grateful while totally exhausted.  I’m exhausted.  I cry cooking meals for my children and myself sometimes.  I wish there was a service that could come cook healthy meals for us all.

Reality, that’s not anywhere near what I can do financially, at this moment.  With two rare artery conditions I can get very tired by early evening.  I fell short of breath and just want to rest.

I need rest BUT I push forward to the best of my ability.  I’m also so grateful that I survived and that I have these struggles.  That some days I’m 100% Okay.  Other days I’m not and I’m grateful I get through the bad and enjoy the good.  I’m grateful I have two kids that accept their mom isn’t always 100%.  I’m grateful that through all of this I’m maintaining a A grade level in college full time and able to work too.  I’m grateful I have a partner who does the best he can to support me and love me when I can get really hard on myself.  I’m grateful I have this blog again to hopefully show others we can all walk through life with grace even when it doesn’t feel good.

I’m grateful.  We all need to remember to be in gratitude.  It really does help us through the rough times.

Mom on a Budget & Holidays Approaching…

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The holidays are approaching and the anxiety of “Will I be able to pull this off” is approaching at a quick pace.

It’s no secret until I’m done with school I’m pretty much broke.  I also have a eight year old boy who may not get that I want to make him gifts or get him practical things.  My eighteen year old is super understanding and she knows that me being back at school is truly making financial sacrifices at this moment.

The guilt I feel that their father can do for them gets to me a lot.  It gets to me a lot that I put him first, put him through school and didn’t do for me BUT that was my choice.  A choice I’ve learned that I can’t undo but I can learn from my mistakes and know I won’t put anyone other than my kids first because I deserve good too.

So, now that we know the reason I’m in this situation is because of choices I made all I can do is get what I can, sacrifice things I may need until after the holidays, look on eBay for used items that I can make look like they’re from Santa (Santa gifts come ready to go) and make my kids feel so loved.

I’ve learned money doesn’t buy happiness and I’m going to work towards this Christmas to show both my children that the holidays are about family and being together.  It’s not always about the shiny new things that kids forget about too quickly.

What are ways you make the holidays easier or less exe pensive for your family?